The Maze Runner

A good book.

Nice movie.

A brilliant re-creation of sociological and anthropological scenarios of mankind.

I am not a first day first show or queue man for movies. I watch once the DVDs are out.

If you or anyone else or I were put on the same place of Alby or Thomas, what would you have done?

Exactely !!

Created rules, habitat, social life stones and brought the people together spreading belongingness and belief in system.

Thomas is kind of good but my favourite character is Minho.

Why?

Thomas knew what he should do, Alby knew what has to be done, all Chuck was trying to do understand what to do but Minho he was different.

He dared to be the lead runner.

A normal Chinese guy, no upper hand, no beautiful girl besides him, no know-how of what the hell was going to happen next, no matter who was right and who was wrong, he just ran.

Ran for three damn years and mapped the entire maze.

What he was lacking?

Nothing. 

Ohh... wait... he was bit afraid and less curious, and maybe he was just running.

But I still like his character.

I am not Thomas or Alby.

I need supports, inspirations, beliefs, trusts, guidance and someone besides me to crack the code.

I can't do that on my own.

Lead ? Yes I can. Explore? Yes I can. Dare? Yes I can. 

Alone? No can do !!

Who's your favourite?

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P.S : Before saying anything, please watch the movie or read the book first. Pretty please.

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Past : You lost or You won !

I have a theory.

If you think it is, go and get a coffee.

If you think it isn't, go and get a coffee.

Here's the thing:

I never remembered when I had Chinese in Last months.

I never remembered how many steps are there to my home from market.

I never remembered ever when I had run a mile and when a mile and a five feet.

I never remembered when I had three liters of water and when I had three and half.

I don't even remember day before yesterday what I had in Food.

Why?

Because, these things don't matter much to me when it comes to my competitive self.

On the first sight, one of my best friend told me I should shave for I look like an Indian Dacoit.

I picked up it, stored it and now just remebered it. 

Why?

Because, I don't want to loose my appearance to a dacoit.

I always store things which either make me win or loss.

What about you?

To be or Not to be

Now I understand.

I am fucked up, stressed, tensed, flushed, in pain; not because I am compelled to be, but because I choose to be.

I am following James.

His writings, blogs, books, answers on Quora inspires me a lot. A big thanks to him.

I had a project presentation, I was preparing for it since Jan., and the committee took only four minutes, five at max maybe, to say, good work but door is at right side.

WTF just happened in those five minutes.

A perfect pitch, amazing bio, relevant work profile, feasible product and you people are showing me the fucking gate to leave.

I was broke. Crushed. Shattered in pieces. It was the male ego who was stopping the rivers. How can they do it? A total scope document. Tons of hours at nights to prepare this shit and in five minutes, BOOM !!??

I was feeling like the trees of Hiroshima, who had had got the first heat waves. In few minutes, the entire region flashing green, wiped away. They might have had seen their neighbors vaporising, their colleagues', if they had any, seeds blasting... Ping Ping Ping. Such a pain to see those things dying in front of us, which have had spent the most time in last few months.

I had deep attachments to that project. It was like my Brain's child. It's son. And got flushed like a dead gold fish in minutes.

I left, came to base, and without getting bothered to slack off the shoes even, crashed to bed and went to thought sleep.

Later in evening, the manager at the nearest cafe marked my feet long face and dared to ask me if I was not feeling well. My mind was begging to punch him in the face of that fucker to dare this action, but some how I had to post a sane behaviour and they serve the best tea in area, I just gathered up drenched muscles to nod Yes.

He might have observed my conditions and didn't ask a single thing till I was at counter, clearing the tab. Escorting me to the gates, he mumbled one tiny sentence, " Sir ! I hope to see you with some new friends next time ".

No one was with me. That fucker went crazy ? I was thinking on his greetings.

I had to cook. I ate. Was watching Justice League: Flashpoint Paradox and the damn brain bulg fused. That fucker was the genius. My today's Guru actually. He observed my rage, anger, frustration, sadness, grief. He told me to come with new friend next time, meant for these.

He pointed that I was not having a good company. These feelings are definitely not the friends what I would ever want if I could choose.

And writing this. I found Yes. This is it. I can actually choose who to friend and whom not to give a damn.

I can be sure and treat rage, anger etc, as guests. Not as stranger, nor as friends. Not as enemies, nor as demons. I want and will and can, treat them as guests. Maybe I don't like them, but what the hell, till the point comes to show them the fucking door, I can't break the sanity of guest gestures, neither I want to sound rude. Maybe one day I won't even bother if they would come, sit, fuck and go. Why would I? They're not getting me anything I like.

Anyway, so I found that, I can actually decode the status quo paradox like Flash did, for my issues by making them guests. I start making them friends, see if they're what I need to grow, if not they're guests. No more enemies.

Can you believe? No guilt, no rejections, no depression, no feeling of incompetent, no sense of being lost, confusion to be or not to be into these feelings.

Amazing person that manager is.

" You can make new friends, daily, or choose to do otherwise. But, having some good tea with new faces; sounds a nice idea to me "

What you say?

Love you all.

Good night.

To be or not to be

Good!

I watched Maz Jobrani’s tour videos last night. He is just awesome. I almost died laughing. I highly recommend to all those who wish to learn how to laugh on yourself, community and tragedies. Amazing man. He creates laughter from observation. Believe me, he didn’t talk anything super-special, just narrated the daily life incidents, but with different perspective. I guess this is the secret.

After not so sound sleep, I woke up two time at night maybe, I got out of bed with a strange dream. I have had less number of best friends. Almost all of them and I were eating out at some place at dream and blabbering the past of each, but we seemed happy and laughing in the dream. I am not sure whether this means I am dropping dead in aloofness or what, but let’s see what happens.

I had to meet some more people to discuss the further progress on the start-up. We had a good discussion over how the social interactions work in the society on the individual levels. How people screen the data, content and information relevant to them, and how these things can be made on the real time platform. It was a two hours long discussion with these new people to make them understand what was in my mind. I learned one more thing on human communication, pictures and visuals impact more and deliver more if represented in the correct manner, than to words or audio or writings.

Anyway, a person from the team and I had a long discussion over so many aspects afterwards. Since the midnight, when meeting got over and we left the café, we both spent another three hours to explore and understand life, society and how to know our own selves in a better manner and with what tools. I really needed this talk, was feeling so heavy since past few days to share what I know. 

Probably this is why this blog and the blog on life, maybe I think I have too much to share, not sure whether this is just a notion or a reality, but I don’t want to be judgemental on this aspect. Why? Well, because I really love this activity, when someone asks or share something with me and I give a long, detailed analysis and suggest ways to get things settled. Maybe this is a part of male ego, seeking satisfactions and getting bigger and bigger in this way, understanding my own self as some master or problem solver, or I am just a simple person who wants to help others with what I know.

I did say, I don’t want to be judgemental but after all I did do it to some extent. This shows how wrong I can be in just a period of less than ten seconds. Maybe I am vulnerable to this attribute of being judgemental about self and trying to monitor and control behaviours, or I’m little confused over the choices, to be or not to be. Whatever is the reality, I understood one thing more, I like sharing, helping and showing that I can solve problems with what I know. This is all for today.

Good night journal and people

Happy friendship day !